The Mindset for a Successful Senior Online Dating Experience
Like anything that’s new to you, at some point you will experience the fear of failure. Senior dating is no different.
You and I both know that the things we want in life may take longer than we had hoped. Becoming comfortable with online dating is no different.
Keeping a positive frame of mind is key when things don’t go as well as planned, or some unexpected challenge pops up. Even the most positive person can suffer periods of despair.
Why some people succeed where others struggle.
Your mindset about online dating at 60, will be one reason you succeed or give up.
If you are over 60, your mindset has had years to develop and get stuck. Your age can be a limitation, but it can also be a tremendous advantage when starting something new.
Experiencing a successful marriage or long-term relationship, sets your mindset for success. There is every reason to believe this next phase of your personal life will also be successful. Whereas with a series unhappy separations, you’ll wonder if you will you ever make a success of love.
No one has ever explained the impact of “Mindset” on success or failure like Carol Dweck. She says we have two types of mindset, a “growth mindset” and a “fixed mindset.” You need to spend the majority of your time in the “growth mindset” to succeed at anything.
With a “growth mindset,” you apply yourself. You are open to learn, have new experiences, fail, learn some more and have another go until you succeed.
With a “fixed mindset,” you believe change is too difficult or even impossible and giving up is easy. After all, it reaffirms your belief that success is too complicated or not for you.
Growth or Fixed Mindset? Which Do You Have?
Carol Dweck in her book “Mindset” presents a test, to determine your mindset. She has kindly given Savvy Experts Online permission to share the test with you.
Take the Mindset Test
Read each statement and decide whether you mostly agree or disagree.
1. Your intelligence is something very basic about you that you cannot change very much.
2. You can learn new things, but you cannot change how intelligent you are.
3. No matter how much intelligence you have, you can always change it quite a bit.
4. You can always substantially change how intelligent you are.
Which questions feel right for you?
Questions 1 and 2 are the “fixed mindset” questions.
Questions 3 and 4 reflect the “growth mindset.”
Which mindset did you agree with more? You can be a mixture, but most people lean toward one or the other.
You also have beliefs about other abilities. You could substitute “artistic talent,” “sports ability,” or “business skill” for “intelligence.”
Try it. Not only is it your abilities but it is your qualities, too.
Look at these statements about personality and character. Decide whether you mostly agree or mostly disagree with each one.
1. You are a certain kind of person, and there is not much that can be done to change that.
2. No matter what kind of person you are, you can always change substantially.
3. You can do things differently, but the important parts of who you are can’t be changed.
4. You can always change basic things about the kind of person you are.
Here, questions 1 and 3 are the fixed-mindset questions. Whereas, questions 2 and 4 reflect the growth mindset.
Which did you agree with more?
Did it differ from your intelligence mindset? It can.
Your “intelligence mindset” comes into play when situations involve mental ability.
Your “personality mindset” comes into play in situations that involve your personal qualities. For example, how dependable, cooperative, caring, or socially skilled you are.
The “fixed mindset” makes you concerned with how you’ll be judged. The “growth mindset” makes you concerned with improving.
Think about someone you know who is steeped in the “fixed mindset.” Think about it, are they always trying to prove themselves? Are they are super sensitive to being wrong or making mistakes? Did you ever wonder why they are this way? (Are you this way?) Now you can begin to understand why.
Think about someone you know who is skilled in the “growth mindset”. someone who understands that important quality can be cultivated. Think about the ways they confront obstacles. Think about the things they do to stretch themselves. What are some ways you might like to change or stretch yourself?
The message is: You can change your mindset.
When we step out of our “comfort” zone into “discomfort,” we open the door to growth. The choices we make and our capability to move through challenges defines our life. Progressing through these difficult times with an attitude of “What can I learn?” provide the stepping stones to growth.
This is the mindset helping people to succeed, even when the path ahead seems too steep.
Oprah Winfrey summarizes failure perfectly:
“At some point, you are bound to stumble… and when you do, I want you to remember this: There is no such thing as failure.
Failure is just life trying to move us in another direction.
Learn from every mistake. Every experience, particularly your mistakes, are there to teach you. Mistakes force you into being more who you are.”
However, it’s not always easy to keep a positive frame of mind in the most difficult of times. Fear can grip you. When it does push through. You are not alone and we are here to help.
Take a deep breath. Work toward maintain a growth mindset.
Why Is It Important To Seek Your True Self?
It’s more like searching for the next puzzle piece in life. It’s a part of building the big picture that lies ahead of your life. Ask, “Who am I and what will I become?” and when you find the answer to that, the rest is just following the right path.
Understand your dreams and desires. Communicate this in your online dating profile to be more confident of who you are and what you want.
Act Your Character: Be Who You Want To Be
Nobody holds your own life but you. Always bear in mind, how you act is who you become. If you decide to act like a winner, you’ll be a winner. If not today, tomorrow, or the day after that.
” Find Me A New Date Online At 60″ is about helping mature men and women to learn how to find new friendships and even love online.